@etiago: This made me chuckle :-) “Science vs. Engineering”


@viktorklang: Combining the Boy Scout Rule with DRY creates one of the most effective ways to reduce maintenance costs and lead times for features.

@ID_AA_Carmack: The desire to avoid unnecessary copying/reformatting of data has often lead me to introduce code coupling that I later regret.

@thijs: Some developers still don’t know you should paste “Iñtërnâtiônàlizætiøn” everywhere while testing

@hseeberger: If you want to measure latency, forget averages, use percentiles! #reactconf

@abt_programming: “The cheapest, fastest, and most reliable components are those that aren’t there” - Gordon Bell

@abt_programming: “I’m hoping our software strategies are boring to you, because they’re not changing every year, … That is our strategy” - Steve Jobs


@rjo1970: After functional programming, I realize dependency injection is just currying for masochists.

@newsycombinator: Friends don’t let friends use Eclipse http://blog.databaseanimals.com/friends-don-t-let-friends-use-eclipse

@RichRogersHDS: “A good programmer is someone who looks both ways before crossing a one-way street.” - Doug Linder

@timperrett: Get yourself some awesome ASCII monitoring dashboards

@copumpkin: All that damn FP talk of Monads and Functors makes code impossible to understand. Let’s stick to Java!

@viktorklang: Any combination of the following should be a compiler error: size == 0, size > 0, size >= 1, size < 1 #use_isEmpty_its_awesome

@nzkoz: Code comments


@abt_programming: “Documentation is like sex; when it’s good, it’s very, very good, and when it’s not, it’s better than nothing” - Dick Brandon

@kellabyte: If you have a distributed system, you better start embracing failures and understanding how you need to handle/compensate/react to them.

@abt_programming: “the craft of programming begins with empathy, not formatting or languages or tools or algorithms or data structures” - @KentBeck

@abt_programming: “Technical Empathy - the ability to see the system from the pov of the caller of your code, not just the pov of your code” - @mfeathers

@abt_programming: “How did you know so much about computes?” - “I didn’t, it was the first one” - Grace Hopper being awesome http://bit.ly/1i1uBZf via @janl

@abt_programming: “I love ground-shifting ideas such as questioning the sense of using DRY. Remember kids, ‘DRY causes coupling’ Which is worse?” - @DavidArno

@chaddickerson: Cynicism is a mental prison. I have never seen anything get better because someone was cynical.

@dibblego: #scala It’s not the language. It’s the people. #won

@djspiewak: Dear…everyone. “3 factor authentication” means something you know/have/are. You gain no extra security from two things that you know.

@djspiewak: As a point of correction, functions are not relations, and thus Int => Int has only (2^32)*(2^32) implementations. #scalasyd

@PicardTips: Picard management tip: If you never fail, you aren’t going boldly enough.

@abt_programming: “Only those who risk going too far will ever know how far they can go.” - T.S. Eliot

@viktorklang: Work with a company, not for a company. #protip

@WisdomViking: To dare is to lose one’s feet for a moment. To not dare is to lose one’s self forever.

@aphyr: Don’t share code between microservices. Write a new handcrafted HTTP microclient for each microservice. Run them on artisanal microkernels.

@martinkl: Microservices. How to turn your monolithic ball of mud into a distributed ball of mud. (via @michiels)

Ball of mud


@VUspenskiy: http://flatmapthatshit.com/ #flatmapthatshit

@viktorklang: “Locks do not compose.” — Old Klingon Proverb

@abt_programming: “Duplication is far cheaper than the wrong abstraction” - @sandimetz

@voituk: Ха-ха! Приблуда для git, которая фотограффирует разработчика в момент коммита https://github.com/mroth/lolcommits … Не хотел бы я видеть эти фото :)

@runarorama: “The purpose of architecture is to shelter and enhance man’s life on earth and to fulfill his belief in the nobility of his existence.” -ES

@abt_programming: “Being a developer is like playing Tetris: Your accomplishments disappear and all of your mistakes build up until U fix them” - @EvanTedesco

@abt_programming: “Don’t write code that guesses the future, arrange code so you can adapt to the future when it arrives” - @sandimetz

@temerev: Я ненавижу писать код: http://sorhed.livejournal.com/579179.html

@DijkstraQuotes: The lurking suspicion that something could be simplified is the world’s richest source of rewarding challenges. http://www.cs.utexas.edu/users/EWD/transcriptions/EWD10xx/EWD1055A.html

@temerev: @runarorama I wouldn’t say that. Simplification is the final part. All intellectual work is identification, of course.

@abt_programming: “When the final design seems too simple for the amount of work you’ve put in, then you know you’re done” - Brady Clark

@CompSciFact: “The price of reliability is the pursuit of the utmost simplicity.” – Tony Hoare

@copumpkin: When you see a tangled mess, take time to unravel it and make it simple. Rarely are systems inherently complex; foggy thinking more likely.

@abt_programming: “The best way to get the right answer on the Internet is not to ask a question, it’s to post the wrong answer” - Cunningham’s Law

@abt_programming: “First do it, then do it right, then do it fast”

@peeterskris: These sets all have the same mean, median and variance. Lesson: Always Visualise. #StrataHadoop @statistiekcbs

Sequences plot

@seancribbs: “Clients are part of the distributed system.” Oh, indeed. @skamille #CraftConf

@evanm: Always remember.

Deleted code is tested code

@dancres: Predictable maximum latency is more important than minimum latency in most applications. Design and optimise accordingly…

@revodavid: The Fourier Transform, explained in one sentence.

Fourier transform explanation

@JobVranish: Want to understand Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle? Position is the Fourier transform of momentum and vice versa.

@levwalkin: Вместо «Ты не понял, сейчас ещё раз объясню» используйте «Похоже, я плохо объяснил, попробую по-другому». Второе правдивее.

@abt_programming: “If you’re the smartest person in the room, you’re probably in the wrong room!” - @singularityu

@AynRandBot: In an intellectual battle, you do not need to convert everyone. History is made by… intellectual movements, which are created by minorities

@abt_programming: “It’s amazing how much you can get done in a day if you just sit and you do it” - Bill Tregle’s Dad

@aras_p: “Solving problems you probably don’t have creates more problems you definitely do” - @mike_acton http://www.slideshare.net/cellperformance/data-oriented-design-and-c

@abt_programming: “Programmers are not to be measured by their ingenuity and their logic but by the completeness of their case analysis” - Alan Perlis

@ilyasergey: This is what math papers should look like: “@a_konyaev: Вот как надо писать статьи по математике

Math Paper

@evanpro: There are only two hard problems in computer science: finishing things, and getting paid.

@pmjordan: Pirate-C entry point: int main(int arrrgc, char* arrrgv[])

@teozaurus: Programming with shared mutable state:

@abt_programming: Reading other people’s code: via @idiot

Reading other people's code

@YaLonelly: подарить ей море радости и незабываемых эмоций сравнимых только с изучением языка Хаскель. http://www.my-barbie.ru/c/3/p/8

@glorphindale: Пятница, кто не деплоит — тот слабак!

@BigDataBorat: Client say they want Enterprise grade technology, so we write all product instruction manual in Klingon.

@ML_Hipster: I once trained an SVM on digits of π until it realised we’re all just eigenvectors of the universe’s Hamiltonian—Now THAT was deep learning.

@jdegoes: Goal of the Spring framework is to take statically-typed, verifiable code and turn it into unsafe strings validated poorly at runtime.

@kmett: “You’re an interesting species. You’re capable of such beautiful dreams, and such horrible nightmares.”

— Carl Sagan, predicting Javascript

@codinghorror: In the future, there will be JavaScript

JS Hole

@joescii: Current status

@wpeterson: OH: “This software system uses the ‘Onion’ pattern. There are endless layers, and peeling all of them back makes you cry.

@ag1le: @rfletcherEW @wpeterson “Indiana Jones” pattern: each layer is archaeology, and architects acting like Nazis force you to solve mysteries.

@TomNomNom: I wrote a book about PHP

PHP: the good parts

@MLnick: When someone asks who my favourite actor is, I reply ShardCoordinator #akka #scala @gbelrose

@teropa: I am a Unix Creationist. I believe the world was created on January 1, 1970.

@altsoph: “The last good thing written in C was Franz Schubert’s Symphony Number 9.” Erwin Dieterich

@graven: Big Data, n.: the belief that any sufficiently large pile of shit contains a pony with probability approaching 1

@dibblego: @larsr_h @tixxit @seanparsons I once objected to object-oriented programming and the only response I got was, “Why do you hate God?”

@tmarble: OH Q: What’s your favorite XML parsing tool?. A: rm

@SiliconBangalor: Один парень писал parse_tranform’ы на эрланге. Говорил — удобно, здорово, лучше чем макросы в лиспе. Его потом, конечно, в дурку забрали.

@vasilenkos: «fprog закрыт РосКомНадзором по 139-ФЗ в отношении пропаганды самоубийства за описание работы сборщика мусора языка Haskell»

@HackerNewsOnion: MongoDB adds a “PLEASE” keyword for inserts, boosting chance that data is stored to above 75%.

@nathandotz: TIL:

try {

(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

} catch() {

┬─┬ ノ( ゜-゜ノ)


// is valid javascript.

@viktorklang: def `true` = throw new CantHandleTheTruthException

@vsv: из жуйка: “У нас было два инстанса Redis, 75 воркеров Node.JS, 5 процессов MongoDB, lighttpd наполовину запатченный lua..”

@jsuereth: “If Java had true garbage collection, most programs would delete themselves upon execution.” http://www.scriptol.com/programming/quotes.php … hat tip to @debasishg

@tproger: Используйте ASCII art, чтобы быстрее находить нужные места кода в Sublime Text



One M[_] to lift them all,

One M[_] to map them,

One M[_] to transform them all

and in the darkness >>= them.

@larsr_h: @tixxit It’s called Object for a reason: if you see it, you should object. @seanparsons

@jfuerth: Now I don’t have to worry if someone steals my potatoes: they’re hashed and salted.


@abt_programming: “Ther’re 10 types of ppl. Those who understand binary, those who don’t and those who didn’t expect this joke to be in base 3” -@jdfitzgerald

@viktorklang: Java has been ready for FP for a very long time with keywords like strictfp and secret sauce like sun.misc.FpUtils

@viktorklang: Whenever I see: publishMavenStyle := true this is what I read:

Maven style

@runarorama: OH: “Exceptions give the Java people a sense of comfort. If there aren’t any stack traces in the log, the system probably isn’t running.”

@potch: alias yolo='git commit -am "DEAL WITH IT" && git push -f origin master'

@potch: git commit -m "Fixed interface issues."

Interface patch

@shhdup: «У тебя комментариев раз в пятнадцать больше, чем кода! Знаешь, как это называется? /» Гомеопатия?”

@TheAngryDM: This new Captcha is hardcore: This new Captcha is hardcore: “Verify You Are a Human: Harm a fellow human or, through inaction, allow a fellow human to come to harm.”

@mattpodwysocki: Finally a JavaScript book from O’Reilly that just speaks to me

JS for Millenials

@suleimenov: ∀∀∃∃::∈∈ “for all upside-down A there exists a back-front E such that colon is in epsilon”.

@Tweety3D: @ID_AA_Carmack I felt a little bit awkward yesterday when I saw function called harvest_dead_children…


@stilkov: It’s fascinating to see how so many people are completely ignorant of the JVM’s many downsides, and think those who don’t use it are stupid

@stilkov: It’s fascinating to see how so many people are completely ignorant of the JVM’s many benefits, and think those who use it are stupid

@potch: I wish so hard this wasn’t me.

Unfinished products

@abt_programming: “1940s: ‘computers’ are ‘programmed’ using direct wiring and switches. Engineers do this to avoid the tabs vs spaces debate” - @jimweirich

@dpwiz: … because Haskell was too easy.

Ithkuil language

@rossabaker: Functional programming for kids: Cosanta, who lives on the South Pole, takes all the naughty kids’ toys up the chimney.

@ktosopl: #akka http://t.co/9vhTPJSWdr(“Responding with anarchy!””) sender() ! LeaderIs(None) ;-)”,”431994068340846593”,”http://log.info,http://log.info”

@abt_programming: xkcd: Hack


@abt_programming: xkcd: Location Sharing

Location Sharing

@akuklev: С подачи Иванакса завёл для алиас pong, чтоб проверять наличие/качество связи было приятнее.



@thedirtycoder: I finally figured out how to get those pesky semicolons and curly braces out of my Java code


@java_hipster: Great photo of a software architect using a Java EE application server

J2EE Architect

@icculus: This is, hands down, the best thing I’ve seen in a game’s source code recently.


@html5_yoda: The American date format, created by me it was.

@abt_programming: “Computer developers are like religious zealots; blindly following the dogmas of their bearded leaders” - @thomasfuchs

@VUspenskiy: “Yolo Application Architectures ;)


@krishnan: Evolution of Software Architecture

Architectures evolution

@techtangents: Is designing software by “modeling real world objects” skeuomorphic?

@boothead: The Prime Minister of Singapore wants to learn Haskell. Sources close to him said that he aims to reduce the role of the State.

@milos_matic: Rammstein style coding :-)